How often do people your age actually have sex?
Enter your age group and average frequency to see how you compare to data from 26,620 US adults in the General Social Survey.
What is the average sexual frequency?
The General Social Survey (GSS), run by NORC at the University of Chicago, has tracked sexual behaviour across a sample of 26,620 US adults over decades. The data shows that frequency peaks in the early to mid-20s and declines steadily with age. For adults in their 20s, the average is around 6.7 times per month. By the 50s, that figure drops to approximately 3.2 times per month, and falls to around once a month or less for those over 65.
The UK's Natsal-3 survey, which gathered data from 15,162 adults between 2010 and 2012, shows similar patterns: a median of 3–4 times per month for 18–34-year-olds, falling to under once a month for those aged 55–64.
Has sexual frequency declined over time?
Yes — significantly. Research published in the Archives of Sexual Behavior (Twenge et al., 2017) found that Americans were having sex approximately nine fewer times per year in the early 2010s compared to the late 1990s. The UK saw a similar pattern: the Natsal surveys recorded a decline in median monthly frequency from 4 to 3 times between 2001 and 2012.
The steepest declines were in married and cohabiting couples aged 25 and older. Contrary to popular assumption, neither pornography access nor longer working hours explain the trend — both actually correlate positively with frequency. The primary drivers appear to be more people living without steady partners, and declining frequency within existing partnerships.
Among younger adults, the shift is especially pronounced. Nearly 1 in 3 US men aged 18–24 reported zero sexual activity in the past year, based on data aggregated between 2000 and 2018.
How does relationship status affect frequency?
The surprising reversal
For most of the 20th century, being in a committed relationship meant having sex more often than single people. That gap has narrowed dramatically. By the mid-2000s, never-married individuals in many age brackets were reporting higher yearly frequencies than their married peers. Cohabiting and married couples reported having sex an average of 16 fewer times per year in 2010–2014 than in 2000–2004.
Why frequency declines in long-term relationships
Familiarity, stress, childcare, and shifting priorities all play a role. Research consistently shows that the decline begins within the first two years of cohabitation. However, frequency alone is a poor predictor of relationship satisfaction — couples who prioritise connection and communication consistently report higher satisfaction regardless of frequency.
What do experts consider healthy?
Sex therapists and researchers broadly agree there is no universal healthy minimum. The focus in clinical practice is on whether both partners feel their needs are being met — "mismatched desire" between partners is consistently shown to be a stronger predictor of relationship distress than low absolute frequency. Research using the term "desire gap" to describe this mismatch suggests it affects roughly 80% of long-term couples at some point.
Frequently asked questions
Yes. Once a week (approximately 4–5 times per month) is very close to the GSS average for adults in their 20s and 30s, and above average for those in their 40s and beyond. There is no clinical threshold that defines "healthy" frequency — consistency and mutual satisfaction matter far more than hitting a specific number.
Researchers point to a combination of factors: later average age of first sexual experience, higher rates of living alone or with parents into the late 20s, increased rates of anxiety and depression, greater social disconnection, and a shift in how younger people form romantic relationships. The causes are structural and societal, not a reflection of individual preferences or values.
The relationship is weaker than most people assume. Studies show that going from once a month to once a week does improve reported happiness, but increasing beyond once a week produces no additional satisfaction gain in most couples. Emotional intimacy, communication quality, and perceived partner responsiveness all predict satisfaction more reliably than raw frequency.
- General Social Survey (GSS), NORC at the University of Chicago
- Natsal-3 — National Survey of Sexual Attitudes and Lifestyles (2010–2012)
- Twenge JM, Sherman RA, Wells BE. (2017). Archives of Sexual Behavior, 46(8), 2389–2401
- Herbenick et al. (2010) Journal of Sexual Medicine